HOW TO BE CONFIDENT – EVEN WHEN YOU DONT FEEL IT

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SHIFT YOUR MENTAL PERSPECTIVE

They say a good blazer is a staple in everyone’s wardrobe! On a fall day in Miami, I wore this stunning Balmain blazer to a meeting. It was one of those meetings where I needed all the confidence I could get, and I definitely had my moment.

 

Lets just say I was not feeling too dandy on this day. I was actually a bit down, it was one of those days where its even difficult getting out of bed, let alone talking to a group of people and being enthusiastic in presenting a project idea.  I had worked very hard for this meet up, so I needed to snap our of it QUICKLY.

 

When you’re working hard toward a goal,  life cannot just stop because you’re having a bad day. Under a circumstance like this –  the most common course of action is to pick up the phone and call your boyfriend / girlfriend or a family member looking for that moment of comfort. 99% of the times they’ll say:

 

“Don’t worry about it babe.. You’re lucky, it’ll go well !” or they’ll give you a little pep  talk and wish you “Good luck!”.

 

Let me tell you something right now: There is NO such thing as “Good Luck!”,  if you don’t work your FACE off and grind hard every single day, doing whatever it takes to EXECUTE on your goals, they will not happen. And thats a fact!

Success is a combination of confidence in who you are as a person and a culmination of many small things that you successfully execute over a period of time.

 

When you’re feeling down, find that fire that lives within you, you have the choice to use it to your advantage or not. The choice is yours! Lack of confidence comes from frustration of not having something you really really want.

 

The antidote to frustration is ACTION. Make every minute of the day count. Take a small action towards reaching your goals. Send that DM message, reach out to that person via email. It doesn’t matter how small it is, do it.  As you accomplish each task your self confidence will grow.

 

There is no such thing as actual reality; there is only your perception of reality. For example, 2 people could attend the same event, see the same people and see the same circumstances, but have entirely different perceptions of the event. Our perception of circumstance is our only reality, you can control your emotions, and therefore control your reality.

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Have patience & stay focused, you’re in this for the long haul.  Dont give a f*ck of what people think about you. Focus on building something for yourself and stop comparing yourself to what other people are doing, how many followers they have, where are they traveling to, how is their business doing. It doesn’t freaking matter. Focus on building YOU and what you want to achieve.

 

You can sit with a friend and chat for hours about all your ideas. Ideas are shit if you don’t execute on them. Instead of spending 2 hours watching a Netflix series or taking the entire afternoon off, because one of your meetings got cancelled. Take that time to take action and launch that project you’ve been thinking of doing for a long time, set up a meeting with a client you’d love to work with. Just do it.

 

I know so many people that don’t even start acting on something they want to do, because of their fear of failure and rejection. If it was easy everyone would do it. I hear so many people saying “I really want this”, or “I really wish I could do that”….You really want it but you don’t recognize the action that it takes to get there.

 

Of course I have my days where I hit rock bottom. But what I told you above – Is exactly  the mental shift I work on every single day of my life to feed that fire and confidence inside me. I really hope it helps you too.

 

The feeling of being 80 years old and having regrets that you didnt try it, its the worse of them all.

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LOOKING CONFIDENT

Make sure your outfit makes you feel secure & pretty, this will help in making you feel more confident when you’re feeling low.  If you need to crush it at a work meeting, a well tailored blazer can take you far. Trust me  I felt like Wonder Woman the moment I put on this Balmain Blazer.  The flattering padded shoulders emphasize its sculped-in waist, making you feel very empowered and feminine. Its a modern day “Power” piece.

 

Lets face it the moment you step into a room, immediately people are forming some sort of impression of you. They’re making quick judgments about what type of person you are — Capable, sincere, trustworthy…. And a lot of this is based on how you carry yourself.

 

If you appear genuinely confident, people will be more inclined to give you the attention and respect that you deserve. If you appear insecure and uncomfortable, people may be quick to dismiss you.

Body language is a CRUCIAL part of communication, in fact NON-VERBAL cues represent 55% of our communication, vocal inflection 38% and our words only constitute 7%.  Did you know that?

 

Self-confidence is a skill. It is something that you can learn how to exude, even by making simple changes to your physical movements.

 

Don’t slouch, stand up straight, square off your shoulders. It communicates you’re coming from a position of power and confidence. Stop fidgeting: playing with your hair, touching your face, this is a dead giveaway that you’re feeling uncomfortable.

 

The list is so much longer, but these are a few points. If you want to learn about quick fixes you can make to appear more self-assured and the power of nonverbal communication and how anyone can use it to their advantage. Let me know in the comments section below.

SHOP THE LOOK

For anyone reading, who is dealing with feeling down or with a lack of motivation in general, please feel free to comment below and lets discuss ways to deal with how you’re feeling. I feel too many people are feeling alone and frustrated with how to attain their dreams & desires. Some people have just graduated college and don’t know what to do now, some others are stuck in a job they hate and feel there is no way out. Others are frustrated with a certain situation at work, that they dont know how to deal with.  I’d love to form a discussion as to how we all can deal with lack of motivation and help others who are struggling.

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